Sail on!

Good morning, and good day to you. Yes, I'm afraid the Moanday beast has once again reared it's ugly, disfigured head over the otherwise bright horizon and is grinning it's malevolent smile directly our way. Although I am pleased to say, that I'm pretty sure that it's usual powers of casting hopelessness into our consciousness are failing this morning.

Let's face it, the weekend was glorious! It has definitely been a weekend of shorts and smiles. For me of course, the two go very much hand in hand. Sunshine = Smiles. And today looks as though it will just be more of the same. So go ahead and wear your shorts, or find that floaty top you like like to wear when the sunshine is coming out to play. Wear a smile and dress less is the general rule of thumb. As today promises to be another winner and who am I to doubt it.

Mondays really don't have to be Moandays. It's only if we let the little rascal have it's way, give in and succumb to the downward spiral it tries to push us into. If we can bask in the sunshine, even for a little while and keep the weekend smiles on our faces, I'm almost certain Monday will lose it's sting. Who knows, we may even make it through to home time with that cheeky grin still showing.

So let's frolic in our own metaphorical field of daffodils or skip beside the waters edge, at the seemingly endless, empty white sandy beach. Let's cartwheel across the birdsong filled buttercup meadows or just lay back on a grassy hill surrounded by breathtaking views and count the white fluffy clouds overhead. Whatever floats your metaphorical boat today, jump on board and let it sail into the sunshine.

See you all tomorrow!

The Beast is dead!

Twas the year of our Lord twenty thirteen. A week had passed since the Summer Solstice and there was much righteous bellowing and rejoicing throughout the land. Eighteen fattened boar's had been prepared in the castle's kitchens for the feast and a ball had been planned to mark this most glorious of occasions.

For the Job Bag Beast had been vanquished and The Work Monster slain. The word had spread like a wild fire throughout the Kingdom, the populous and his kinfolk were now awaiting the return of their heroic champion for the celebrations to begin in earnest. When their blooded and battle weary warrior would finally be reunited and welcomed back to the bosom of his companions.

Oh yes!! I am now officially the Prince of the Printers. The Emperor of the Epsons. The Viscount of the Vinyl and The Duke of Design. The monolith of the job that has been hanging over me all week is done! I am in fact quite surprised myself that it is finally all over! I'm even more surprised that it's all over this morning! I definitely still expected to be immersed in stressful busyness until close of play today.

Still done it is, so let the the Friday festoons swing from the rafters and the glad tidings of the weekend was over us and become like sweet music to our ears. I literally do feel like a massive weight has been lifted from my shoulders. Huzzah! huzzah! and thrice Huzzah!

So I shall leave all you prepossessing people to revel in your own particular brand of Friday whimsy and shall see you all after the weekend. If not before!

Tuesday is as Tuesday does.

Well, let's just say I'm quite pleased that Monday is out of the way this week. Honestly I was like a bear with a sore head most of the day. Which really wasn't helped yesterday evening, by one of the cats knocking over a full tall glass of Coke Zero which I had only just got myself. You'd be amazed at just how far a pint of Coke can go when knocked over! Seriously, I am pretty horrible when I've got a cob on. Definitely best avoided at all costs.

I'm not even sure what the cause of it was to be honest. I think I must of just got out the wrong side of bed or something. Although I think if I tried to get out the other side of bed The Tremendous Lady T would be slightly annoyed. As I'm not sure waking somebody up by clambering over them, just for the sake of trying to get out of bed the other side would necessarily go down very well. In fact I think it may way have ramifications onto her disposition.

Whatever it was it does seem to of passed thankfully anyway. Who knew I could actually feel better about things when a The Tuesday raised it's little head over the horizon? Mind you even though it's not particularly warm yet, the sun does appear to be making an effort on it's part, which does always help.

Although the day hasn't started brilliantly so far, I have already managed to submerge my hands into a sink full of water mixed with a very large percentage of bleach in it. You see when I got in this morning I saw a note on my desk and I thought to myself, 'that'll be some kind of work instruction that I need to carry out. I'll just go and pop the kettle on first before I look at it'. So I trotted off to the kitchen area of the building to find the fridge pulled away from the wall and a small plastic tray in the sink. Wondering what it was I plunged my hands into the sink to have a look at it. That was the point I smelt the bleach. Anyway, I put the kettle on and went back to read the note which said: 'CARL: I have found the source of the smell! It was a plastic catch tray on the back of the fridge. It's now in the sink in lots of BLEACH. So if you need to empty the sink put gloves on as the bleach is very strong.' Normally this would of called for a 'facepalm' moment, but giving the state of my hands it probably wouldn't of been the best move on my part.

Ahh hindsight is a wonderful thing as they say. Still you live and learn I suppose I guess the moral of the story is don't avoid notes at the office because they may not always be work instructions. Here's hoping the day gets a little better anyway.

See you little munchkins tomorrow.

Monday. The un-Wanted.

Morning world. Yes I'm afraid it's Monday once more. Once more, the jewel encrusted treasure of the weekend has been taken from us by the hideous, vengeful thief of joy and has been replaced with the soiled pouch of disappointment and emptiness.

Once more, we have awoken confused, bleary eyed and with a heavy heart. Knowing that a fresh week has beeb thrust upon us and there is nought that can be done about it. We have no choice, we must face it, no matter our readiness for it.

Sorry about all the doom and gloom this morning, can't be helped. I unfortunately seem to be suffering from the effects of waking up grumpy. (No there's no need to make jokes about disturbing good Lady T from her slumber. I'm talking about me!) Just woke up in a foul mood this morning, I mean don't get me wrong I have the kind of face that normally looks grumpy and confused first thing in the morning, particularly on a Saturday morning for some reason. Where morning confusion doesn't normally leave my system till gone 11:00am. Which is not always a good thing, considering we are normally up the town by about 9:15am on a Saturday.

Still, awoken grumpy I have, nothing I can do about it, so I am sorry about that. Probably best if people avoid me till it goes away. Even on the way into work this morning I slipped into anger at the radio! 'The Wanted' were playing, yes I know this probably is enough to make most people get cross with the audacity of their sheer existence. The thing that annoyed me particularly is their stupid song "Walks like Rihanna" The lyrics to the chorus are "She can't sing, she can't dance, but who cares – she walks like Rihanna.

Now I'm sorry, but has anyone actually made any mental notes on how Rihanna walks?! Now if the song lyric was, "... who cares – she looks like Rihanna" I wouldn't have a problem with it!! She's a very attractive girl! Yes, she's got issues and troubles, but who hasn't! Yes, it's probably true that underneath it all she probably doesn't have a very strong feeling of self worth, but sadly this day and age very few of us do! Sadly though the song doesn't say that it just talks about her walk!! Something that most people, unless it's particularly noteworthy in a unfortunate way, don't really pick up on. I mean yes, some women throughout history like Marylin Monroe and Jane Russell probably had very slinky cat-like walks. Which I suppose could be seen as sexy, but so do a lot of other women. It's not something that differs from one individual to another!

Sorry, the one thing I'm forgetting here, is that a The Wanted song and indeed The Wanted themselves, really aren't important in any way shape or form. And I'm letting it bother me just because I'm in that kind of mood when stuff will bother me and I will get annoyed. Oh dear, I feel sorry for my colleagues this morning.

Once again I apologise for my outlook and cantankerous nature this morning. (Ooo 'cantankerous' there's a good word) I shall of course do my best to snap out of it by tomorrow morning.

IT'S FRIDAY!! Let's have a sing song!

To the tune of ‘Escape (The Pina Colada Song) - by Rupert Holmes)

I was tired of the week days, they all seemed far too long.
Like a worn-out recording, of an old boring song.
So when I woke from sleeping, I read Facebook in bed.
And on somebody’s status, there was an update that read:

“If you like drinking a Radler, and don’t care if it rains.
If you like a good yoghurt, and you’ve only got half-a-brain.
If you like dancing after midnight, in the pub with ya mates.
Now’s the day that you’ve longed for, it’s Friday, let’s escape.”

I didn’t think about the work day, I’ve never been over keen.
But this monday to thursday, was just the same old dull routine.
So I clicked ‘like’ and replied, and started typing like mad.
And though I’m nobody’s poet, I thought it wasn’t half-bad.

“Yes, I like drinking Radler’s, and I don’t care if it rains.
I’m not mad about yoghurt, but I am a little insane.
So let’s meet up it’s Friday night, I could wear my red cape.
At a pub where there’s a dancefloor, it’s Friday, let’s escape."

So the work day just flew by, just after five I left the place.
I was smiling in an instant, I had a beam across my face.
I was free on a Friday, So I met up with friends quite a few
We all had a good laugh, and I said, “I never knew”...

“That you liked drinking a Radler, and didn’t care if it rained.
And why even talk about yoghurt, I fear we must be insane.
So let’s dance till after midnight, well at least until very late.
Don’t you love a good Friday, So here’s to you all my mates”

“If you like drinking a Radler, and don’t care if it rains.
If you like a good yoghurt, and you’ve only got half-a-brain.
If you like dancing after midnight, in the pub with ya mates.
Now’s the day that you’ve longed for, it’s Friday, let’s escape.”

A taste of Summer.

YAaaaawwwn . . . oh dear! Morning by the way. Sorry, but I am feeling more than a little tired this morning. I think I may of slept too heavily (yes, yes please do feel free to insert an easy joke about me being to heavy in here.) I think it must of been due to the early rising of yesterday. Whatever the reason was I was still very much deeply in the land of nod when my alarm beeped into life this morning. The trouble with that is of course is that it leaves your brain in an even more confused state than it would even be normally. So I was slowly shuffling about this morning, before I'd had my shower looking remarkably like a confused grumpy zombie. I sounding like one too, with my occasional confused long groan used instead of speech. Mind you I think we all look and act a bit like that when we are awoken from a particularly deep sleep.

Once I was out of the shower, thing were more or less ok thankfully, but that point I had remembered how to walk and speak. (well more or less) As I said, I think it must of been down the earliness of the day before that must of got me. Although I did find a new drink that I really enjoy yesterday too. Which I polished off a whole pack of yesterday evening!

You see, I saw an advert for this drink on the telly the other day and thought, 'well that sounds disgusting!!' then me being me I thought 'I wonder what it's like?' So the dutiful Lady T put some on the shopping order for this week. So yesterday afternoon, when I finished work around three due to the early start I thought I would crack one open and give it a try. As it seemed to me that it might go down very well with a hot sunny day, which yesterday afternoon was a prime example of. I was not wrong.

It's made by Fosters and it's called Fosters Radler. Basically it a mix of Fosters lager and cloudy lemon. I know!! It sounds disgusting doesn't it!! I mean, I'm really not a big fan of Fosters lager at all. I'm not sure many people of our age are to be honest. I believe that Fosters is really only for people aged between 17 and 20, when you are first practicing the art of drinking. It's a lager for cutting your drinking teeth into before you acquire a proper drinking taste. Although I do like lemony things, so I was willing to try it.

All I can tell you is to put aside your discrimination of Fosters lager and give it a try. On a hot sunny day when the Radler has been chilling in the fridge for at least a day, it really is a joyous, totally refreshing wonder of enjoyment on your tastebuds. It's really is very lovely, the only trouble being is that one is really not enough and pretty soon I had polished off the lot. Sorry, I do apologise, this morning's look at life sounds just like an advert! Still, if something is worth crowing about, crow about it I say! (Other refreshing summer drinks are available)

See you tomorrow! :)

Send in the Nap Mats!

MORNING!! Sorry bit loud. morning! *whispers* How are we? I a bit of an early start again today, I was up at the crack of dawn again. (No! Stop it! Don't make a frankly very rude joke about someone called Dawn at this point, it would be far too crass for this early in the morning. I thank you so very much) I was up with early birds (none of them were called Dawn by the way) and the small hoppity bunnys, and was at work at about 5:40 this morning. I had to meet one of our installers here to send him off with a job to go and do at six.

On the plus side, this will mean I will be able to skidaddle off early this afternoon, but matchsticks still may be called upon to keep my eyes open this evening. Still, I always have been a bit of an early bird. I'm definitely at my most productive during the very early hours. Unfortunately this does mean that by about 3:00pm I do get a bit restless and fidgety. In fact I think that we should really take a leaf out of playgroups and use it in the work place.

Wouldn't it be nice if at about 3:00pm in workplaces across the country, the machines were switched off, the computers shut down, the blinds drawn and we all settled down for half an hours nap time. It would be lovely! We could all bring in pillows and blankies from home, then take off our shoes and settle down for a little mid afternoon power nap. In fact workplaces could also then supply little "Nap mats" as well. Nap Mats being a product I just made up. Basically long foam mats with a cotton covering, in a variety of colours and designs. You could have themed "Nap Mats" for what ever was the current in thing. Like a 'Man of Steel' Nap Mat or a Nap Mat with a lovely picture of Jessie J or Robin Thicke on it, whoever floats your boat really.

I do think though that there is probably a multitude of sciencey facts that I could bend or stretch or just make up as to why this would be a benefit to us as a Nation as a whole, but to be honest I think that most people would just love the idea and want to do it anyway! Mid afternoon naps are definitely a step in the right direction for us Brits in the workplace I think.

Do enjoy your Wednesday, with or without a Nap Mat and a blankie.
See you tomorrow!

Good Morningtude!

Salutations, hello and good morningtude to you. Yes! I made up a word there, 'morningtude' In the 'Carl's Concise Mostly English Dictionary' it says this:
Morningtude [mor.ning.tude]: Normally used as a greeting, meaning literally, your morning attitude.

So I am wishing you a very fine morningtude indeed! Although it is slightly easier today, (even though it's a The Tuesday) as it looks as though the sun may come out to greet us again. Although obviously do make sure and carry a wet weather coat with you, as we all know it is actually impossible to dress for the weather in this country. They do keep saying there will be showers during the day. Can't have it all our own way, although wouldn't it be good if we could.

Still, gladly I see we have all survived yet another Monday. We haven't quite yet got into the full flow of the week yet, but that normally kicks in at some point on a Tuesday afternoon, around 2:36pm. So do look out for that point today. You'll be busy doing something or other (whatever it is that you do to keep yourself from mischief during the day) and you'll realise that you are suddenly totally wrapped up in what you are doing and you are just thinking of the task in hand and what the next task is and how quickly you can achieve it so you can get onto the next one. That is the point you have found your flow for the week.

Oh! and for those of you that are at all interested, I do have news! I have decided to actually write that book, that has been floating around in my head for the last month or so. If for no other reason than it will get all the ideas out of head and stop them flooding all my idle moments. It seems that when ever my brain has the chance to switch off, instead it has been coming up with another idea for the story. So really the only way to stop this I see is to actually get them out of my head and onto paper. Well, probably a word document to begin with. The idea of it ever actually making it to being on paper is highly unlikely. Still, once it is finished I shall be trying my hardest to try and see that it does. I mean there's no harm in trying is there. So as they say, do watch this space.

Right, well believe it or believe it not, I do have things myself I must rush off and do, so best go and make a start on them. Do have yourself a copable Tuesday. I'm sure it will pass without too many unwanted shenanigans. (Is copable a word? Or did I just make that up as well?) See you tomorrow! x

Facing the Monday struggle

Morning! I'm afraid to say that once again, Monday has crawled along the ground on it's belly, then leapt into a crouch and moved silently as a ninja behind us, before leaping from the shadows of Sunday night in a lighting quick pounce onto our backs. We may of put up a struggle for a while, but sadly, the long thin wiry arm of Monday, which has a totally disproportionate amount of strength to it, was around our necks and it's long spindly fingers pushing a soft cloth over our mouth and nose, before we could struggle no more and dropped to our knees before falling face first into the wet dirt, knowing that we will have to face the Monday and there was no way to avoid it any longer.

Ooo, sorry about that. Twas a bit of dark way to kick off your Monday. You were probably quite ok before I tore in with my sense of foreboding. Still like it or loathe it Monday is upon us once again, and yet again we face the unknown horizon of the upcoming week spread before us.

I trust you all had sufficiently pleasant weekends and feel ready for whatever will come our way? I'm sure it'll be more of the usual, moaning about the lack of sunshine, kept busy with the normal day to day stuff before at some point collapsing onto the sofa before heading to bed and try and face the world one more time the following day.

Still, if we can keep our jolly on, and face each day with a little spark of hope in our hearts and a smile on our faces I'm sure it'll be just fine. As they say, every journey start with a single step. So rather than carrying around a heavy heart, let's put on a brave face and tackle this thing called Monday together, because when we pull together and actually properly support each other there really is no end to what we can achieve.

See yawl tomorrow dearies!

The Pompatus of Love

Some people, call me the space cowboy. Yeah! Some, call me the gangster of love. Some people, call me Maurice! *Whit woo!* Cause' I speak of the pompatus of love. Now I do have a couple of problems with this otherwise fine song from 1973.

Firstly, 'Maurice'? Was Maurice a particularly sexy sounding name in 1973? I really have no idea, but I should imagine it probably wasn't, so why even mention it? Let alone follow it with a wolf whistle on the guitar? Surely there were sexier sounding names to choose from, like 'Burt' or 'Guy' or 'Leif'. Unless it was meant as a sarcastic wolf whistle of course?

Anyway secondly and most importantly, what in the name of arse is a "pompatus" and how can you have one of love? Also, if you do speak about one of love, why does that mean you get called Maurice!? *Whit Woo!* (Stop it!) A 'pompatus' sounds like it should be a medium or large sized river dwelling mammal of some description. Don't get me wrong, it does sound like a lovely whiskery faced, waffly nosed creature, just sadly one that does not exist!

Now of course, I thought maybe I have misheard these lyrics all these years. Entirely possible of course. I mean who can forget such classics from the Village People as "We want you, we want you, we want you as an ooreegoo" So yes I admit it can happen. I thought maybe he was singing "the properties of love". So I looked it up. According to 'Lyrics Freak' he says "pompetous" where as according to 'az lyrics' and 'sing365.com' it's "pompitous". In any case it still doesn't make any sense what-so-ever! Apparently there was even an entire film made about this subject in 1996 called "The Pompatus of Love" where basically four men discuss women and the meaning of the word "pompatus".

I suppose it will just have to remain one of those mysteries that we never really get to the bottom of. Like UFOs and Bigfoot. Although I do have my theories about them as well. Although that will have to wait for another day.

Still, as Mr Manilow quite succinctly sang "Looks like we made it". Yes it is Friday, we have made it to the wagging tail of the week. Where joy should have no limits and frivolity should take over and cover us like a warm bath with many bubbles. So kick off your worries, let down your metaphorical hair and shake it like you just don't care. Huzzah for Friday! I'll see you folks early morningtide the other side of the weekend.

Always take a wet weather coat.

Ladies and gentleman of the class of 2013.
Always take a wet weather coat.
If I could offer you only one tip for the summer, keeping a wet weather coat handy would be it. The long term benefits of having a wet weather coat during a British Summer are countless, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience...
I will dispense this advice now.

You cannot make someone love you. All you can do is try to make yourself someone who can be loved. The rest is up to them.
No matter how much you care about people, some people just don’t care as much back.
It takes years to build up trust, and only seconds to destroy it.

No matter how good a friend is, at some point they’re going to really hurt you, mostly unintentionally and you must forgive them for that.
It’s not what you have in your life but who you have in your life that really counts.

Never ruin an apology with an excuse. As the excuse make the apology null and void.
You can get by on being charming for about fifteen minutes. After that, you’d better know something worth knowing.
Don't compare yourself to other people. You are unique and precious just as you are.

It's possible to do something in an instant that will live with you and cause you grief for the rest of your life.
It takes a very long time to become the person you want to be.
Always leave the ones you love with loving words. It may be the last time you see them.
You can keep going long after you think you can’t. You are way stronger than you imagine you are.

It's only ourselves who are responsible for what we do, no matter how we feel.
You either control your attitude or it controls you.
Regardless of how hot and steamy a relationship is at first, the passion will fade and there had better be something else to take its place.

Real heroes are the people who do what has to be done when it needs to be done, regardless of the consequences for themselves.
Money is a rubbish way of keeping track of how you are doing.

With a best friend you can do absolutely anything or nothing at all and still have the best time ever.
Sometimes the people you expect to kick you when you’re down will be the ones that actually help you get back up again.
Sometimes when we're angry we have the right to be angry, but that doesn’t make it ok to be cruel.

Just because someone doesn’t love you the way you want them to, it doesn’t mean they don’t love you with all they have to give.
Maturity has more to do with what types of experiences you’ve had and what you’ve learned from them and less to do with how many birthdays you’ve celebrated.

Never tell a child their dreams are unlikely or silly. Few things in life are more humiliating, than being told your dreams are stupid, and what a tragedy it would be if they actually believed it.
Your family won’t always be there for you, they will at times let you down, but people you aren’t related to can take care of you and love you and teach you to trust people again. Families aren’t just biological.

It isn’t always enough to be forgiven by others. Sometimes you have to learn to forgive yourself.
No matter how bad your heart is broken the world doesn’t stop for your grief.

Our background and circumstances may influence who we are, but only we are responsible for who we become.
Just because two people argue, it doesn’t mean they don’t love each other. And just because they don’t argue, it doesn’t mean they do.

You shouldn’t always be so eager to find out a secret. It could change the way you see your life forever.
Two people can look at the exact same thing and see something totally different.
No matter how much you try to protect your children, they will eventually get hurt and you will hurt in the process.

Even when you think you have no more to give, when a friend cries out to you, you will find the strength to help.
Certificates on the wall do not make you a decent human being.
People you we care about most in life are normally the ones taken from us too soon.

It’s hard to determine where to draw the line between being nice and not hurting people’s feelings, and standing up for what you believe.
Most people will forget what you said, and people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.

And finally, it's a lot easier to give advice to people than it is to act upon it for yourself, but trust me on the wet weather coat.

Space . . .

Deafening silence. No sound at all to hear. All around is the cold blackness of the empty void of space. The only light to be seen comes from the multitude of stars giving out their tiny pin-pricks of light into the overwhelming vastness. Now the camera in minds eye is turning slowly. Turning and rotating until a red glow appears on the edge of our vision, which very quickly turns into a flood of blinding light from the distant sun. Now the camera is moving forward and panning round to centre itself on a small blue planet the size of a marble.

The camera focuses on the planet and holds it's position. Suddenly were accelerating forward at speed so immense, although were merely observing it still feels as though it's pushing us to the back of chairs. Faster and faster it goes towards the blue planet which is already the size of a tennis ball and still growing quickly. Even faster, and the surrounding stars are blurring and becoming mere streaks of light as we pass closer and closer to the planet.

Closer still and still traveling at break neck speed the planet shows details, the clouds swirling across the surface like drops of oil in a puddle. Nearer still, and masses of land come into view, continents spin slowly on their everlasting journey around the planet. Careering onward, the planet is now taking up the whole of our field of vision. The vastness of the planet is becoming more apparent. Zooming still nearer we begin to slow, and head for what looks like a tiny island towards the top of the planet. Closer and closer we go, still traveling so fast but slowing down all the while. We head towards the bottom right hand corner of the island. As we break into the atmosphere the dark blackness of space becomes varying shades of blue. Sky blue now, and ahead of us a blanket of cloud. Punching a hole through the clouds we continue onwards.

What was a small tiny island is now a sprawling mass of land. It seems to be varying shades of green with earthy brown areas in between. Further and further towards the ground we plummet all the while a roaring wind fills our ears and the criss-crossing patterns of fields come into view. Reddy brown areas seem to be forming in geometric grids as we get even closer buffeted be the wind around us. Closer still and we now clearly over a small town. As we move even nearer and building come into sight, we're now over the outskirts of the town and still heading towards the earth.

In the middle of countless field all around a small cluster of buildings are forming an island of structures in an otherwise green and lush surroundings. We zoom over one of these buildings and slow down even more. Now as the wind quietens and the sound of distant traffic becomes apparent the camera is no longer pointing straight down but turning over the edge of the metal roofed factory building. Down the front of the building the camera stops in front of the glass paneled door to the building.

From outside, looking in the camera has now come to a rest and we see through the window a man sat in front of a computer screen tapping away on a keyboard in front of him. We somehow pass through the window without making a sound and move across a small office to where the man is sitting. Slowly, he takes his hands away from the keyboard and turns towards us.

"MORNING!! How are we? Happy Wednesday to you! See you all tomorrow!"

Into every life a little rain must fall

Well slam dunk da funk if it isn't 'The Tuesday' already! To be honest with you that Monday, although it passed through relatively quickly, it certainly did ruffled my feathers! (Metaphorically speaking of course. Thankfully, feathers are not on the list of things you start to mysteriously start sprouting as a man after hitting 40) It was nothing huge, just many many things that were all apparently super urgent and all had URGENT written on them in capital letters with red biro and underlined several times, just so I was more aware of how URGENT they in fact were! Grrrr . . . I hate those shouty URGENT job bags. I could of certainly quite happily managed without their presence on a Monday. Still, as I've always said, we can all only do, what we can do, and nothing is going to change that, so we shouldn't really worry too much about these things. Although we all do of course. Personally I wouldn't know what my head would be full of, if it wasn't constantly worrying about something or other!? (Don't answer that! The answer was bound to be rude!)

Still, today does seem to be starting on calmer waters and for a 'The Tuesday' that is pretty much all I can hope for. Still got things of the URGENT variety to achieve but hopefully all will be well. Yes it does look like we may be having some of that wet stuff falling from the sky onto our heads today, but as the saying goes "Into each life a little rain must fall". A true fact there if ever there was one. If you were wondering it's from a poet called Henry Wadsworth i believe. Still he makes a good point, we can't go around expecting every day to be sunshine and smiles. As much as we would like them to be, sadly most of the time that isn't the case. All we can do is do our very best to try and make other people's lives a bit sunnier and smilier by being the person who tries to bring them. I think if we all did that, the world be a much nicer place to be.

Although Henry Wadsworth, might of got it right when he said that, I think overall the rest of the poem is a bit bleak and maudling to be honest. Still I suppose you have to be a bit bleak and maudling to be a successful poet? I do think however that the last verse of his poem would sounded a lot better if he had swapped a few lines around, and maybe added an extra one, like this:

Into each life some rain must fall,
Thy fate is the common fate of all,
Some days must be dark and dreary,
But take ease and rest, all that are weary,
Be still, sad heart! and cease repining;
For behind the clouds the sun is still shining.

So rest well dear travelers on the Tuesday highway,
I'll see you tomorrow, halfway to friday.

Moanday again . . .

Good morning, good day and indeed welcome to your Moanday. Yes I did spell that correctly thank you. I really think we should be allowed to change the names of the week to more appropriate names. Of course this could be done on a country by country basis and every country would get to submit their ideas for the new names of the days of their week. The only rule being that their choice of name would have to end in ". . . day". 'Moanday' would be such a better name for it I feel, as let's be honest, we do spend a good proportion of our Mondays moaning about something. Be it the lack of sunshine, the amount of work we have facing us, the fact that we just have to get up early again or the fact that some weekend plans were scuppered in some way. (Ooo 'Scuppered' another word for my list of words I enjoy saying). Whatever it is we do generally find something good to moan about on a Monday morning. So Moanday it is.

Sorry, small side track I went down there. For all I know you may of all had marvelous, unbridled, gratuitous weekends of sheer delight! (hmmm gratuitous another good one) You may well be coming to the table with tales unrepentant joy and laughter filled weekends of utter bliss. Although I fear, that for most of us it was just a normal weekend, when we busied ourselves with the normal trudge of chores that must be done, and a Sunday that really wasn't as sunny as we all hoped it was going to be. Before waking up and realising it was Monday morning once again and we will have to jump on the week-day merry-go-round and start peddling towards the weekend once more.

Still, as always, I find that a Monday is always made slightly easier to cope with when I turn on the telly box while I'm getting ready to see the lovely Susanna Reid beaming back at me. Although I really do think that the BBC should have some kind of warning on screen about her. Something like "WARNING: Some viewers will find the presence of Susanna Reid very distracting and may well spend far to much time gawping at the screen rather than getting ready for work" (hehe "Gawping" yet another good one!) She really is though! I mean her mouth might be saying things like "A new survey has revealed that as a nation we really don't have a proper understanding of food hygiene" but her eyes are definitely saying something different! Her eyes are saying "Underneath this prim and proper exterior is a very very naughty person waiting and wanting to get out and do very naughty things". Although to be fair, that may just be how my mind works first thing in the morning. Sorry about that.

Still, must crack on and busy myself with Moandayness I suppose. Lot's to do and usual stresses to cope with and all that. See you all tomorrow!

Friday Sing-a-long!

Good morning you beautiful examples of human beings. Grab yourself a pretend microphone if you will and sing along now. (In the the style of My Way by Mr Frank Sinatra if you would please . . .

And now, weekend is here
And so we face the final work day
My friends, I'll say it clear
I'll state my case, we’re done with Thursday
We've had a week that's full
We’ve traveled each and ev'ry highway
But more, much more than this, it’s now a Friiiday

Regrets, I've had a few
But then again, too few to mention
I did what I had to do and saw it through without exemption
I’ve planned to chart a course, to the pub along the byway
And more, much more than this, it’s now a Friiiday

Yes, there were times, I’ve had a few
When I bit off more than I could chew
But through it all, when there was doubt
I ate it up and spat it out
I faced it all, I stood tall and made way for Friiiday

For what is Friday, what has it got?
It’s so carefree, So I’ll tell you what
Let’s say the things we truly feel and have a laugh, kick up our heels
So let’s all get out, let’s scream and shout that it’s FRIIIIIDAY!

Let your primitive side out why don't you?

MORNING! So how are we all? Still full of Summer bounce I trust? There is only one problem I can see with this frankly gorgeous weather and that is, it does tend to bring out the lazy in all of us. (Or is it just me?) I dunno there is something about clear blue skies and sunny warm weather that just makes me want to take it easy like a Cadburys Caramel Bunny. (Come on now chaps, admit it, you found the Cadburys Caramel Bunny a little bit sexy didn't you? . . . Ah . . . just me again then?) It does just make you want to switch off and go and lounge in the sun with maybe a long ice cold drink of something, preferably with a straw. Trouble is of course, most of the time we simply can't do that! We have things to do and places to go and jobs that must be done. So we kind of just carry on doing things in a little world of our own, because most of our brain power is being used to fight the natural instinct to want to lay down and lounge in the glorious sunshine.

I think there must be something way back in the history of man, something primordial that draws us to lounge and lay back when the sun is shining. It think it goes way way deeper than just wanting to top up our tan. I think our bodies actually crave sunshine and the vitamin D it provides us. I think perhaps even back then, there would of being crowds of early man and woman all laying outside their caves on a sunny day just sucking in the sunshine.

So I say let's get out there as often as we can and let's just get primitive!
Ugg

Things that go bump and meow in the night

Good morning dear friends, colleagues. This morning I would like to offer a formal apology. An apology to my, let's face it, long suffering good lady wife. You see, to start with last night was much like any other night just before sleep. I had read for a bit, to the point of tired where my eyelids became heavy and I had re-read the same few sentences over and over again, because I had got to that point of sleepy when I couldn't really concentrate and my eyes had kept closing. So I put down the book on the bedside table then plugged in my earplug to listen to Radio 4 Xtra as I drifted off to Slumberland. All was just as it should be and I was happily drifting off. Then I heard a noise. It sounded like one of our cats had jumped down from the window sill and onto the bedroom floor. Now at this point I should really explain that as rule we try and keep the cat's out of the bedroom. Mostly because the Wonderous Lady T suffers from a mild case of cat allergy. Most of the time it's ok, but we still like to make sure that the cats don't get in the bedroom.

Anyway I had heard what I thought was a cat jumping down into the bedroom from one of the open windows. You see despite what we think we know about about cat's they still are quite thumpy when they jump down from things. Plus of course I heard the jingle of the collar when it landed. So I immediately sat up and in a semi-conscious state just pointed at the window and blurted out "CAT!" At this point, wonderful Lady T looked at me a little confused and said "What!?" So I repeated the action and said "CAT! Cat's got in the window". So she removed her earplugs (Sadly, an absolute must in order for her to have any chance of sleeping next to me) and said "Sorry I had my earplugs in, I didn't hear anything". Meanwhile I just laying there looking like a village idiot just pointing and saying "Cat! In the room".

Dutifully the marvelous Lady T then proceeded to get out of bed and look around the room, and out of the curtains while trying to explain that the windows weren't open wide enough for one to get in anyway. Then she looked in the en-suite (Ooo! Get me and my en-suite) Still no cat to be seen, and the door was closed to the walk-in wardrobe (Yes, walk-in wardrobe, Ooo very fancy) so she couldn't of got in there. All the while I was just sitting up in bed looking confused, and saying "I don't understand, I definitely heard it!". After a little while and further investigations into the non-existent cat the long suffering Amazing Mrs T gave up and came back to bed, leaving me to somewhat in a state of confusion go back to sleep.

So with that in mind, I would like to offer my most sincere apology to my very long suffering Mrs who has to put up with more than her fair share of my madness for most of the time. I am truly very very sorry. If in the future I think I hear an imaginary invisible cat, I shall endeavor to be the one who get's up and goes searching for it. Once again, I'm sorry. Still as my Mrs said in a related post last night, "At least it wasn't aliens this time!" (Seriously, don't even get me started on them little blighters!)

Hey ho! See you tomorrow, and enjoy the sunshine!